The Garden Review
Preface to the "Y edition"
This is a translation made from an older story i never finished. It is expreselly made for the amusement of Ms. Y and only because she asked for a story, i like this one. Also, translating something you wrote to another language is quite funny: For example i don't know exactly why but even if i try no to i end up sounding too polite. When i read something i wrote in english i imagine myself writing that as an old dude with a ridicoulous moustache, a fat polite englishman (it's disgusting). So keep in mid that the story could change based on that.

Jimena Writes

Since she was very little Jimena has a gift or trick of sorts, she writes allthough maybe "writes" is not a suitable word for the action implies that traditional means of doing so are at play.

In her case its by spitting, she starts to feel a tingling around her tong at first, nothing serious, but if she lets it unattended for too long the tingling sensation begins to take form, like little flakes at first but ending up feeling more like like chewing a bunch of little black plastic triangles.

Its not that bad, i mean the only thing she has to do to get rid of them is spit and they are gone for a time.

The thing is her saliva forms words, yeah, entire texts formed out of saliva. I know you wont belive me but this kind of thing happens in the world.

Anyway Jimena Writes now, she writes novels for publishing houses and also writes for newspappers, she writes wathever she can write about.

The first to notice were her parents of course, they still hold a bed sheet that reads "Hace mucho que no me urge nada, lo que urge solo puede salir mal" like that, in spanish they saw the words take form and researched what it was written in a corner of it with elegant but clumsy cursive letters.

They decided not to make a big deal of it though, shuch a thing happens in the world as i said. They had a baby that spited constant nonsense and other parent had kids that refused to talk or pee on the toilet, just a natural thing, because when dealing with babies the only constant expectation one can have is surprise.

At 15 years old she lost her virginity, she also began to study the mechanics of her bar trick, "the spiders" as she called it at the time. Her friend was Luciana, a tall and nimble blonde girl, an exceptional dancer and fun as hell. So a perfect friend for a 15 year old girl, and it was in fact her who proposed having fun with such a courious thing.

One night she stayed at Jimena's house, Luciana started boasting about how she could move her pointy noise exactly like the girl in "bewitched" and they laughed for a while, after that Jimena said she also had a weird thing to share and told her that if she bited an entire garlic poems would come out (thats the way she put it), they rushed to the kitchen to see it and its fair to say that Luciana was expecting nothing more than seeing her friend bite a garlic, it was enough of an event already to be excited about.

The taste was awful, actually disgusting but Jimena endured though it because she knew what would come after. She waited for 5 minutes for the flavor of the garlic to settle all around her mouth, she took some water and started spitting in a blank paper that she held infront of her face. Imagine the amazement of Luciana just crawling over her shoulder to see the smelly saliva move around the now stained blank page, turning into blue ink and gattering around what seemed to be words.

The result of the experiment was a diagonal text writen with was clearly a cheap blue pen, and with really bad cursive letters that made it hard to read. But most important was the meanings of the words. It was a text written by clumsy teen to a girl in class he liked full of annoying phrases like "oh you don't know how much i love you" and "i think you are awesome" repeated sometimes three times on the same paragraph.

The piece was so disgustingly corny that you could not feel but sorry for the guy who wrote it, and it could not come from other than a short and fat boy who would not lose his virginity until being 30 years old, and even in that case it would be with an ugly 50 year old divorcee, dry as a wire and while listening to sleepwalk by Santo and Jhony.

That was at least the description that Luciana gave of it laughing her hearth out in the floor, crying even. She even searched for that song on the computer to add realism to the joke. Spot on if you ask me, Luciana had allways been a blissfully ignorant genious.

After that day they spent all weekends like that, they ate at Jimenas house with her family and after that they locked themselves in the room (To be continued)